Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Guest Etiquette Question

[Cher Stuewe-Portnoff (cherworks01]

** sigh of relief ** Thank you, Liz. Our intention is always to participate
in whatever work we can, to be courteous and responsible, and to pay our
way; to make small donations to common house funds where it seems
appropriate; but also not to reduce personal kindnesses to commercial
transactions. I love Nina's approach, a win for everyone, but in truth, by
the time we have funded our travel to and from communities we hope may be a
good fit, we would be (and often are) camping out, conserving our meager
funds for an eventual down payment some place. We also love
bed-and-breakfast establishments -- but from afar :-). Other perspectives
welcome!

C.  

-----Original Message-----
From: tamgoddess [at] comcast.net [mailto:tamgoddess [at] comcast.net] 
Sent: Tuesday, October 24, 2006 6:31 PM
To: Cohousing-L
Subject: Re: [C-L]_ Guest Etiquette Question

Oh, dear. A conundrum for sure. I've never received any compensation for
giving tours, as I consider it a part of my duties to my community and my
larger community of cohousers around the world. Once in awhile someone
offers, and now I feel that I've been remiss in not accepting for my
community's coffers! I may have to accept in the future. 

We've hosted lots of people over the years, though we don't have a
purpose-built guest room, and no set fees. We have had larger groups who
slept in sleeping bags, etc., and I think small voluntary donations have
been gratefully recieved, but were not expected.

I would in no way be offended if someone offered nothing to stay in my
house, though I haven't hosted many people over the years-mostly relatives
of other cohousers in my community.

I have gotten some gifts over the years, and those were really wonderful. I
like when someone has taken the time to do that. A Japanese magazine writer
gave me a bottle of sake, that was the best one.

The only thing that has ever come close to offending me as a tour guide is
someone not showing up when they say they are going to, or showing up
without notice.

Liz
 -------------- Original message ----------------------
From: <seniorcohousing [at] cox.net>
> 
> ---- Cher Stuewe-Portnoff <cherworks01 [at] yahoo.com> wrote: 
> 
> > There's probably not one right answer, but we could sure use a sense of
what
> > is generally considered good manners before we travel any farther :-).
> > Thanks!
> > 
> > Cher & Greg 
> 
> My personal opinion, as a fellow guest: make a donation to the general
cohousing 
> community fund equal to about what it would cost to stay at a nice B&B in
the 
> neighborhood.
> 
> I've only stayed at two communities, both times in guest quarters.  No one
has 
> ever complained about my donation, and both times, I got a thanks from the

> financial committee.
> 
> I also feel it's appropriate to make a donation if you've had a tour.
After 
> all, someone has spent at least an hour, sometimes much more, to take you 
> around.  My time is worth a lot.  I assume my tour director's time is
worth a 
> lot, too.
> 
> And, ahem, there is a side benefit.  Folks get to know your name if it's
on a 
> check.  It's just human nature.  I've never run across a cohousing
community 
> that couldn't use a little cash.  If you have it, share it.
> 
> If you don't, though, you might want to offer some other thing of
value--work 
> time, for example.  If you're an expert in something, offer a specific
number of 
> hours of consultation in return for your visit.  It may be that no one
will take 
> you up on it right away.  In fact, it may be years.  But surely part of
the 
> cohousing movement is giving what you can when you can?
> 
> Nina, Ocean State Cohousing, RI
> _________________________________________________________________
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> http://www.cohousing.org/cohousing-L/
> 
> 

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