Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: a private person in cohousing

[Lynn Nadeau (welcome]

Lynn here, at RoseWind, a long established community in Port Townsend 
Washington. This isn't just about caring for the needs of self-identified 
introverts. There is a wide spectrum of preferences about communication and 
socializing. 

We had a successful discussion circle, with summary notes emailed, and 
additions made by people who weren't at the circle. It was about How do you 
like to be contacted? and such. 

Topics included
= at your home: drop in any time, knock and enter, call first, assume I only 
want to meet with people in common spaces and not at my home, I nap in the 
afternoons, etc. 

=use of email: check all the time, check once a week so phone if it's time 
sensitive, fine with emotional content in email, only informational email 
please do emotional processing face to face, etc. 

= phone preferences- best times, like long chats, want only brief... 

You could initiate a survey form, followed by a discussion circle, or 
whatever process. I'm feeling it's time to do it again here, as it's been a 
few years and the population and preferences have evolved. I'm sure you'll 
find a lot of variety among even those you see as extroverts. 

At the very least, you can email your community, saying you value your 
connections with them, and want to let them know what works best for you, in 
terms of -- whatever your list is, about in home, in common spaces, phone, 
email, and so forth. 

One other thing we did here, for a while, was that some who found meals over 
loud and bustling, set up a couple tables in the rec room for a designated 
quiet dining area.