Cohousing-L Mailing List: troubled resident

[Lynette Bassman (lbassman]

Hi.

We have an older resident who has recently been struggling with some kind of 
dementia-like syndrome (still being diagnosed) that involves acute paranoia for 
at least part of most days, and mild confusion during the good times.  Several 
other residents have been in touch with her adult daughter who lives about 4 
hours away, and have been helping manage the situation and take care of the 
resident, taking her to doctors' appointments, trying to soothe her, encourage 
her to take her medication, etc.  But her needs are escalating, and she does 
not always respond to us.  Instead, she sometimes becomes quite frightened of 
us.  So unless the situation improves very soon, we are thinking that she won't 
be able to continue to live here, despite all the loving support that her 
neighbors can provide.  We are wondering if any other communities have faced 
similar situations and if so, what your experience was.  We especially are 
struggling with the limits of the care that it is appropriate for neighbors to 
provide, and how to help her daughter know when it is no longer okay for her to 
live here, or at least not without professional in-home care.  Thank you for 
any wisdom you can share.

Lynette 
La Querencia Fresno Cohousing