Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Diversity in Cohousing

[Lisa Kuntz (lisa.kuntz]

Thanks, Crystal.

I find that being aware of microaggressions is especially challenging and
can be a painful and uncomfortable subject, for me anyhow.

I've taken MANY classes on racism and racial diversity, including a
workshop at a coho conference.
And still, I can be unintentionally offensive.

Perhaps a good example is my mention of the Fair Housing Act in
relationship to racial diversity.  Even if POC had any interest in living
in our community, we can't hold a space for particular buyers, just in
order to get more diversity of any sort.  My understanding of the Fair
Housing Act is that we must give everyone the same information and let them
decide whether or not they are a good fit for our community.  A seller
can't decide, for example, that they will sell only to a family.

This may seem tangential to the convo but it's a hot topic on our
Membership Team, because we reply to questions from the public and give
tours in order to facilitate sales.

Aside from that issue, from everything Crystal and others have said, our
community and other cohousing communities are not creating a safe and
welcoming environment for POC.  AND, it's not just in cohousing but other
communities, such as the virtual senior village I'm part of, that this is a
problem. Our senior village would very much like to invite more racial
diversity, but it's slow in happening, even though they have a group that
discusses that specific topic.

Yes, Crystal, I'll be taking your class and encourage others to do so.

Lisa Kuntz
Daybreak Cohousing



On Tue, Feb 21, 2023 at 11:27 AM Crystal Farmer <crystalbyrdfarmer [at] 
gmail.com>
wrote:

> Responding to Sharon's comments about addressing the comments. Zev did not
> acknowledge the harm done by stereotyping Black people (via another person)
> and then further caused harm by calling a Black person "articulate," which
> is commonly used to describe Black people who don't fit the stereotype of a
> person using the language he used already! I know it's hard to be aware of
> these types of trigger words, but it is what it is and it was hurtful.
>
> I think it's valid to make assumptions. It's harmful to make assumptions
> based on ignorance, which is what happens with racial minorities. It causes
> harm and it needs to be pointed out. Our response to the pointing out can
> also cause harm even with the best of intentions. This requires work on
> multiple levels.
>
> I appreciate those engaging in the conversation. Another plug for my
> upcoming webinar which is conveniently about what's happening here:
> https://www.ic.org/event/addressing-microaggressions/.
>
>
> > > On Feb 21, 2023, at 7:58 AM, Abe Ross <cohoyote [at] gmail.com> wrote:
> > >
> > > Why do you feel it necessary to note (a) his colour (b) his being
> > articulate (c) the. colour of the person to whom he is married? Would you
> > have done that if he were not  person of colour?
> >
> > Since Zev was being accused of assuming that all Black people would use
> > the language this man used, it is most appropriate to say that this man
> was
> > other than what his accusers were assuming him to be assuming about him.
> >
> > It?s important to address comments in context. In this context, Zev was
> > responding to questions about those very characteristics. The only way to
> > address them is to address them.
> >
> > If the subject is color, you have to discuss color.
> >
> > Sharon
> > ----
> > Sharon Villines
> > Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
> > http://www.takomavillage.org
> >
> > --
> Pronouns: she/her
>
> Websites:
> www.crystalbyrdfarmer.com
> www.bigsisterteams.com
>
> Schedule a Meeting:
> https://calendly.com/crystalbyrdfarmer
>
> Buy "The Token: Common Sense Ideas for Increasing Diversity in Your
> Organization" wherever you buy books or online
> <https://newsociety.com/books/t/the-token?aff=28>
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