Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Key Principles of Cohousing [was Is cohousing a consumer product?

[Kathleen Lowry (kathleenlowrylpcclmft]

Sharon, I understand the fear of being constricted in community-but certainly 
if the talk is about community “agreements” truly ready potential members would 
be ready for those? If someone doesn’t understand that relationships and 
community are based on agreements, I’m not sure they’re ready. 

> On Mar 15, 2023, at 3:08 PM, Sharon Villines via Cohousing-L <cohousing-l 
> [at] cohousing.org> wrote:
> 
> On Sat, Mar 11, 2023 at 7:57 PM rebecca.selove <rebecca.selove [at] 
> gmail.com>
> wrote:
> 
>> Thanks everyone for the interesting comments.  As a member of a forming
>> community I have a question for those of you who have lived in cohousing 10
>> years or so: what do you think are the key principles that ought to be
>> explained to people who are checking us out?
> 
> I would suggest that explaining principles and “contracts," as others have 
> suggested, is probably not the best way to explain how a community works. 
> Instead, describe what happens. How is this or that space used? What kinds of 
> gatherings occur each week? 
> 
> What are the points of view that are affecting a decision you are making? 
> Give an example of how a problem was solved, even if it is an old one. 
> 
> People may be happy with doing things this way or that but not agree that it 
> is the result of believing in a certain principle. And some people rebel a 
> the idea of “contracts”. Their fear of community is based on being 
> constricted in one way or another.
> 
> Sharon
> ----
> Sharon Villines, Washington DC
> "Behavior is determined by the prevailing form of decision making." Gerard 
> Endenburg
> 
> 
> 
> 
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