RE: Diversity and Values
From: Rob Sandelin (robsanmicrosoft.com)
Date: Mon, 17 Apr 95 13:46 CDT
Buzz you interpreted:

>The paradox is that without common values cohousing just isn't going to work
>well (as Rob explains in detail), while on the other hand, if everyone has the
>same values, we are validating intolerance and are going to have a hard time
>creating any diversity, which is another goal.  They are somewhat at odds with
>each other.

I am not sure I agree with your interpretation above.  You can have 
scads of diversity and still have agreement on a set of core values.  
You can be of all colors, religions, incomes, etc. and still all agree 
for example, that environmental concerns  are core to the project.  By 
doing this you might exclude people who view environmental concerns a 
different way, but that is an extremely tiny bit of conformity against 
which can be applied a whole ocean of diversity in other areas.  So I 
am not sure I agree that in making environmental concerns a core value 
of a project you would be validating intolerance or have a hard time 
creating diversity.  You just wouldn't have  "anti" environmental 
viewpoints around the dinner table.  That's OK, you will have lots and 
lots of other issues to toss around at dinner between the Muslims, the 
Christians, the Jews, the Druids, the Latinos, the Asians, the African 
Americans and the Native Americans of your community.

You do not have to have agreement on all values although you might want 
to get agreement on values and issues which cause difficulty in living 
together.  When your values place you on an extreme edge away from most 
other people you generally know that.  For example, I know of a person 
who calls herself an extreme Vegan.  She actively is prejudiced against 
people who eat ANY kind of meat, won't have them as friends,  etc.    
Her values are such it would cause a pretty major conflict to have her 
in any group that dines together that isn't Vegan and she knows this 
and thus excludes herself from eating with anyone who is not a Vegan. 
(including her own family)  If she were to form a community, and NOT 
express her values in the values statement, it would cause huge problems.

Thus issues which the core founders find important enough to filter 
out, such as non-violence, environmental, etc. should be written down 
clearly and so filtering the folks who join which can agree to live 
with those values.  It does not have to be a huge list, covering every 
single issue, only those which the core founders strongly believe in. 
(note: what this means is that the core founders get to pick the kinds 
of people they want to live with to some extent) .  I would also 
suggest that if a value has a specific meaning to the core founders, 
such as if non-violence means not using threats and intimidation in 
meetings or other settings and guns are not allowed, then I recommend 
detailing those as much as is possible so there is no confusion over 
the meaning of the statement.  This seems like it may limit the people 
who come to join the community and it will. For example, the 
Sharingwood pet policy has turned people away.  This filtering happens 
at several levels and I think it is better to do it on the first 
contacts then much later, after a potential member has more invested.

There is then the whole huge issue of the political nature of all this 
stuff and how cohousing is supposed to be "non-political" and just a 
more convenient lifestyle not political like a commune, etc.  And that 
is a very valid point - if you don't want to be "political" about who 
joins your development, you don't have to have any sort of values or 
mission statement.  But what I keep learning is that ALL cohousing has 
some sort of political spin to it, its just not always up front and out 
in the open.  Non-smoking is a political spin and I have yet to hear of 
a group which allows smoking in the common house. If I were just 
starting to form a group, I would be pretty clear about what my values 
were to all joining members.  It would be a real tragedy  to invest 
three intense years of  life in creating a development which ends of 
full of people who don't share my core values and  I really don't want 
to live with.  It is very hard to build real community in this kind of 
environment.


Rob Sandelin
Sharingwood

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