Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: bullying help

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

> On Mar 25, 2022, at 10:40 AM, CJ Q <homeschoolvideo [at] gmail.com> wrote:

> Another issue I think is that there seems to be power dynamics over single
> parents (in some communities) and anyone who is neuro diverse.  I know of
> one community where two families with kids with autism moved out (not
> feeling supported or respected there), a man with possible neurodiversity
> only rented at that same community for a few months, and another woman who
> identifies as nuerodiverse is leaving with her family.  Maybe support and
> resources is needed for that too.

One thing I learned from living in one place for 22 years (not typical of my 
life at all) is how things change over time. How people change individually, 
how communities change, and how long it takes to develop a common culture.

When thinking about these conflicts, it would be helpful to know how developed 
the communities are and how long the person had been living there. In the first 
2 years after move-in, it would make sense that there has been a disconnect 
between expectations and abilities. Communities take time to develop the skills 
they wish they had to be the people they want to be. 

Some of this has to do with the ages of people in the community and how much 
experience they have had socially with resolving conflicts and adjusting to 
differences. Multi-generational communities are desirable because each 
generation has a different experience of the possible.

Sharon