Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Conflict Resolution

[Rowena Conkling (rowenac]

We have found as we get to know each other better that less and less
actually comes to the point of having to formally reach consensus or
"vote."   Most of the the time issues are raised in an informal way in
committees, on our email list, on the chalk board in the common house or
over the dinner table.  Difficult or contentious matters are identified long
before somethign is  brought up for formal decision and,  by allowing those
who have strong feelings to thrash out the details in various ways, by the
time something comes up for a decision there is generally a proposal that
people can live with.  We have arule that a significant issue must be raised
at two consecutive meetings so that there is no need to press an issue if it
proves divisive at the initial meeting.    When something is brought to a
General Meeting which raises unexpected opposition, we may do a "straw-poll"
to identify those who have problems with the proposal  and send it back to
committee.  The committee may then go through a discussion "process"
off-line or they sometimes ask for a "hopes and fears" session to assist
them in drawing up a revised proposal.

If your community is getting lots of votes blocked or it looks as if voting
may be required I suggest you step back and look more carefully at the
pre=meeting work

RowenaC
Cambridge Cohousing