Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Parenting in Cohousing

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

On 13 Jun 2011, at 2:00 PM, Jessie wrote:

> Cohousing is a great environment to stretch safely in. One year my daughter 
> house sat for another member while they were on vacation. She was three doors 
> down but "away" and responsible for two cats and several chores.  My son does 
> odd jobs for a member in a wheelchair.

How do people handle payment for jobs? Not the housesitting — which is a great 
idea — but watering plants, feeding pets, errands, etc. In one sense we want 
children to be participating the way adults do — not being paid — but at the 
same time it is helpful to the children to learn to ask a "fair" wage, be 
responsible, and take responsibility for earning the money for things they 
want. One is helping to pay for a private school education his mother can only 
almost afford and another to pay for a horse for her American Girl doll. (When 
she had saved the money she decided it was too expensive for the amount of work 
involved.)

As an adult it's hard to draw the line and know when to offer payment and when 
to just say thank you, but at the same time, I don't take out Roger's trash or 
help him move his rugs.

> They both help on cooking teams (voluntarily) but they don't always want to 
> be on cooking teams with their parents. 

One of the times I wished I had the good sense to go get my camera (and have 
the battery charged) was seeing 90+ year old Bob and 8 year old Gretchen alone 
in the kitchen doing the dishes after dinner. 

(Now I have an iPhone but I still have to remember to use it.)

Sharon
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Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org