Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: getting people to wash dishes and do post-meals clean up

[Kathy Tymoczko (kathy.tymoczko]

See below.

On Thu, Oct 8, 2015 at 9:01 AM, Sharon Villines <sharon [at] sharonvillines.com>
wrote:

>
> What do you do when people want to sit and talk and clean up is going on?
> Do they clean up and sit back down?
>

Almost everybody clears away their own dishes.  They may sit back down or
continue helping clean up

>
> Can they clean up and sit back down for coffee?
>

We don't usually have coffee at community dinners.  But they could do that
if they wanted.

>
> We have groups of people, usually a table full, who sit and talk for at
> least an hour after meals. Others who sit for shorter times. It’s hard to
> signal clean up without interrupting these nice times.
>

They just get interrupted.  Sometimes people will clear away the dishes of
the "talkers".  On weeknights, most people aren't inclined to linger,
especially those with kids.

>
> I must say my very least favorite plan is to ask for volunteers mid event.
> I feel guilty if I don’t volunteer but a very many people don’t feel guilty
> at all. This the guilty clean up and the others don’t.
>

That's pretty much why we stopped doing it.  People who felt guilty if they
didn't volunteer quit coming to meals because they didn't like feeling
guilty or coerced, and people who didn't feel guilty didn't volunteer.
With the expectation that everybody helps, the guilt went away.  There is
occasionally still some resentment about people who come to meals
frequently and rarely help clean up.

>
> Everyone clean up seems better but I think having an assigned person
> ensure it happens and to help those who are unclear about what to do might
> be helpful.
>

We generally have enough people present who have done clean up a lot that
this isn't an issue.  And there's a (generally ignored) check list posted
on the fridge if people don't know what needs to be done or how.  The
Food/Kitchen Team will sometimes do updates at plenaries if things are
habitually not getting done or not getting done properly.

>
> Sharon
> ----
> Sharon Villines
> Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
> http://www.takomavillage.org
>
>
>
>
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-- 
Kathy Tymoczko
Daybreak Cohousing <http://www.daybreakcohousing.org>
Portland, Oregon
765-307-1083