child raising brochure clarification
From: CJ Q (homeschoolvideogmail.com)
Date: Tue, 6 Apr 2021 08:45:57 -0700 (PDT)
Hi again,
Let me explain why I thought of this idea.  So far the ideas are perfect
and exactly what is needed - ideas and thoughts about kids and families in
Cohousing and common grounds.
Laird has an example in his blog that one community had problems with
neighboring kids using their playground equipment and he points out they
hadn't made expectations for any kids. He seems to be a big proponent of
making agreements and expectations about a lot of things before conflicts
occur.
I keep seeing some marketing from a forming group about how wonderful child
raising is in cohousing. I admire their idealism but the fact is that
having a lot of young children can cause conflicts over expectations on
their behaviors in common areas (not on how people parent or deal with it,
but what does the community want or expect living together).

In my experience, 2 households left (in part) from feeling like other
parents were not supervising their children and trying to stop a specific
horrible behavior).  Another family had similar concerns but also the
balance of raising their kids and time in cohousing. The other family I"m
not sure exactly why they are leaving but I think they didn't like others
in the community pointing out the destruction their children were doing to
others and private and community property.  Another person left for noise
reasons which were not exactly children but they never went to a common
meal because the children were running around and too loud.
So, I just would love to tell this forming community that it is wonderful
to market to young families but for  all members to have realistic
expectations and to discuss what may come up and the more beforehand the
better. One reason I loved the idea of cohousing was to raise my children
and I wanted them to get to know neighbors of all ages, but how the whole
community reacted (or under - acted) made us up end our lives and move
again.  Maybe it is unavoidable and I"m just un realistic and people will
move no matter what since living with others and their expectations was
harder than anyone expected.

Thanks again,
Carol

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