RE: Values in community, was sexuality
From: Alexander Robin A (alexande.robiuwlax.edu)
Date: Thu, 16 Mar 2006 15:08:54 -0800 (PST)
If I understand what you are saying, I'd reply that there are many different 
types of cohousing just as there are many different types of people (even 
liberals:)). Some are more concerned with the eco-aspects of their community. 
Others more with the social. I could go on about the differences but suffice it 
to say that it is important to study the group's stated mission and covenants 
and talk to them a lot if thinking about joining a cohousing. The cohousing I 
lived in was very interested in the social aspects and the lives of the 
children. They were not as concerned with the eco-aspects though they had 
attempted to build the houses with some energy efficiencies in mind. It was a 
very inviting community regarding single, family, sexual orientation, old, 
young, etc. Some may not be. No one way of being defines "true" cohousing other 
than the structure of having people intentionally live in a community, owning 
their own units.
 
Robin Alexander

________________________________

From: Anna i Bartlomiej Jurkiewicz [mailto:jurkiewiczowie [at] wp.pl]
Sent: Thu 3/16/2006 4:47 PM
To: Cohousing-L
Subject: Re: [C-L]_ Values in community, was sexuality



I hope you will tolerate the point of view of an oversea barbarian :)

1. Cohousing based on non specifally liberal point of view - is it possible?

I can accept existing of a hypotetical group which call themselfs cohousing (as 
they fit in MacCamant and Durrett 6 points)
but are somehow commited to more advanced ecological style of life.
They try to avoid using a cars as much as possible,
to use as small amount of energy in houses as possible,
etc.. The respect for the Nature is as such written into their
mission statement, and is something what they share together
and was one of main inspirations of building the cohousing.

Assume there is a friend of them who whant to join and life in the cohousing,
but doesn't share the commitement and has three cars (including 2 SUV's ;) ),
declare he/she will do not want respect the wild life on the cohousing 
territory,
or make any attempts to conserve energy used in commonhouse by him/her
or by her/his household.

If they press him/her asking for rethinking this again and
choosing their approach or not joining the cohousing,
is it intolerance or commitment to one of the common values they share?

Can they call themselfs cohousing group in such a situation?

Has the value of tolerating behaviour of others to be more
important for this group then the values they decided to choose
as the most importatant for this community?

What if the main value is not a commitement to respecting the Nature
but a commitement to the Buddist (Christian) practice?
Are they still cohousing group or not?

Should all groups calling themselfs cohousing be strongly
grounded in specifically liberal point of view?

2. Polyamo in my cohousing group.

We are in the small cohousing group here in Poland,
looking for the ground, now.
Somehow basic for us is our commitement to a Christian practice.
I think this group do not accept the polyamo behaviour
(I do not mean person who has the polyamo problem - _only_ the behaviour) and 
will
ask for rethinking joining to the group or
more commitement to a standard Christian point of view.

I think it is caused by a specific, not quite liberal, point of view.
I think it could be demanding freedom in receiving,
accepting and respecting the gift -
the children who can be one of results of sexual activity,
And giving all possible time to the one lover
only thus making the relation really exceptional.
However, I will not discuss if someone tolds me it is just the
obscure and closet point of view a person who was grown up as barbarian,
as you can have your own feelings connected with the subject
and I do not want to discuss with these feellings ;)

BTW similar if the gay or lesbian person is concerned.

With respect,
but interested in results of the letter,
Bartek Jurkiewicz



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