Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Inappropriate Behavior

[Muriel Kranowski (murielk]

Responding to these in increasing rank from totally innocuous to possibly
problematic:

Asking to borrow a car for an important local trip. - very acceptable, and
the trip doesn't have to be that important

Responding to email post that may not be directed to you but that you have
information about. -I don't think anyone would object to this.

Asking question of neighbors pertaining to their health, work, community
involvement  or their family.- So, is it okay to ask nosy questions...
depends on the relationship, the situation, the context in which it's
asked, all of that. My husband just had serious surgery and EVERYONE is
asking about his health, and that feels good and supportive. But when I
knew a neighbor was out of work, I didn't want to keep bugging him with
"How's the job search going?" even though I was concerned about him.

Mentioning to community members about their lack of participation around
tasks they have chosen or assigned.- Well, since we all know this is not an
easy conversation to have, we have a workshare position called Workshare
Tracker whom we authorize to have those conversations for us. You have to
have the right kind of person for this, and fortunately we do. Somehow this
question has a very privacy-invading vibe to it, even though it directly
affects the community.

    Muriel at Shadowlake Village