Cohousing-L Mailing List: RE: Conflict Resolution -- Avoiders

[Maggie (maggie]

Some might refer to avoiders as "aloof".  James Redfield, in the Celestine
Prophesy identified 4 "control dramas", which are ways we try to get energy
from others...in this case....an aloof person may like it that others are
wondering and puzzling over what he or she may be thinking...thus getting
considerable energy from a group.  It would seem like pseudo peace to think
that avoiding can resolve anything.  Isn't avoiding in this instance
resisting???? As the saying goes "What you resist, persists".

Maggie Dutton,
H.O.M.E.S. (Housing Ourselves Made Easy Society)
Addressing the need for affordable housing in Calgary.
www.thehomesproject.shawbiz.ca  (this link should be functional in a day or
two)
Q -- Since Avoiders are the majority in life as well as in cohousing, how
does one engage them in resolving conflicts?

And is there a better name than "Avoiders"? Some Avoiders find this term
pejorative and prefer to see themselves as Peacekeepers.

Sharon
--
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org


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