Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Re: Refining concerns / needs

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

On 7/20/03 10:55 AM, "Cheryl Charis-Graves" <ccharis [at] earthlink.net> wrote:

> Feelings and concerns usually arise out of core needs. So it is helpful to
> an individual to identify their core needs. Often, what feels like raging
> emotion is a reaction to a core need that is not being met. Addressing the
> core need ? not necessarily the feeling ? resolves the concern more
> effectively than trying to understand and assuage the feeling.

Not everyone is interested in either knowing or revealing their core needs.
And we do not all have facilitators who are interested or capable of doing
this kind of work. If issues have to be discussed at this level, it would
unnecessarily restrict participation in cohousing.

While core needs may not change, they manifest very differently in response
to different situations. We have lots of members who believe that expression
or discussion of feelings is entirely inappropriate in meetings.

Sharon
-- 
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org

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