Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Behavior guidelines for Common House

[Louise Conner (lc]

We didn't set up guidelines for behavior in the Common House until we had
some experience (some negative). After the whole community had discussion
facilitated by Laird Schaub, we came up with the following which is included
in our Resident Handbook.Hope this helps!

Norms for behavior at common meals

1. Walking fet
2. Inside voices
3. Safety -- other items will help -- i.e. no running = less likely to bump
into others
4. Mess. Spills should be cleaned up when it happens. Ask an adult near you
for help. Food should only be eaten at the tables (i.e. not while walking to
the table). Kids need to clean up their dishes, take to the kitchen and wipe
up any spilled food.
5. Waste of food. Ideally kids should get to eat first. Kids need to think
about what is being served and take only what they think they will eat.
Smaller portions first and kids can always come back later for more. One
dessert is appropriate. We all need to share.

If the norms are not being followed -- the following has been recommended
for non-parents:
Get the child's positive attention.
Get buy-in that the agreement exists (the one that the child violated).
Get buy-in that the behavior was outside the agreement.
Attempt mutually agreeable resolution.
Get help from parents.



Louise Conner
Casa Verde Commons
(With a history of two years plus of living together.)