Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Bullying

[Kathleen Lowry (kathleenlowrylpcclmft]

Another phrase for “held accountable” is “held capable”-they say every time we 
don’t hold someone accountable we are failing to hold them capable. Another 
perspective.

> On Sep 5, 2022, at 9:32 AM, Kathleen Lowry <kathleenlowrylpcclmft [at] 
> gmail.com> wrote:
> 
> Cynthia-good presentation-thanks! Helpful to be reminded that we are all 
> wired differently-why curiosity, listening an d appreciating differences is 
> so important.
> Yes, we know that “hurt people hurt people” and the most common denominator 
> among bullies is that they feel unsafe and have had their boundaries not 
> respected or needs ignored. 
> And as a therapist, very often clients don’t realize or accept they are as 
> sensitive as they are.
> Still, I believe people have to be held accountable for their effect on 
> others-otherwise they don’t grow, in my experience. And some even if they are 
> held accountable don’t grow.
> Kathleen 
>> 
>> The message was posted Mon Aug  8, 2022 during the discussion on
>> Bullying and is being posted now when her presentation is available.
>> Her presentation is at https://youtu.be/gqhfGBVINxA
>> 
>> --------------------  FORWARDED MESSAGE FOLLOWS --------------------
>> I have a presentation on sensitivity that includes 30 plus years of
>> research from different scientists and  shows that 70 percent of us
>> are likely to be sensitive. Out of that 30 percent are highly
>> sensitive. The remaining 30 percent are less sensitive. This is not a
>> diagnosis but seems like an interesting strategy for our species.
>> 
>> What happens to the nervous system when a highly sensitive person
>> feels bullied is not the same for all bodies.  For highly sensitive
>> bodies- the impact on the nervous system hurts really bad.  Highly
>> sensitive people need more skill, practice, and supportive
>> environments. When bullying actors take charge of our environments,
>> highly sensitive, often gifted, people step away.
>> 
>> I sometimes wonder if those who ‘bully” are actually highly sensitive.
>> I wonder how many highly sensitive people are attracted to Cohousing
>> for the promises of value based support.
>> I wonder how to share this powerpoint presentation.
>> 
>> Cynthia Winton-Henry- Fair Oaks Ecohousing
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>> 
>>