Re: Privacy for Introverts
From: David Heimann (heimanntheworld.com)
Date: Wed, 30 Sep 2015 19:06:18 -0700 (PDT)

Hello Everyone,

Since I'm not very good at all at mind reading, I like the system we've set up for privacy or not in public spaces. We have small signs that ask for privacy. Whoever would like privacy in a public space displays one of those signs. No sign means it's OK to say hello.

Regards,
David Heimann
JP Cohousing



Date: Wed, 30 Sep 2015 12:42:02 -0400
From: Elizabeth Magill <pastorlizm [at] gmail.com>
To: cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org
Subject: Re: [C-L]_ Privacy for Introverts
Message-ID: <DEBEC415-B087-497C-8818-D56BCE0FCBC0 [at] gmail.com>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii

This is a huge problem for me. Our porches were available for nearly a year before the common house had its occupancy permit (long story), so they have developed into a major socializing place. I *love* that.

*And* it means that being on the porch appears to mean you want visitors. *And* I personally have no ability to say no to neighbors. So my neighbor comes up, says "want visitors" and I always say yes. Even when I am supposedly writing my thesis or an article, or doing work. I even sometimes say "I'm working but I can take a break".

Mama mia!

I finally sent a note to my neighbors explaining that if I am in the back yard, please do not ask me if I'm free--assume I am not. I hope to build a deck and dream that I will then start getting work done.

Also there is the common house question: when my "sit silently and write" group meets during the day we usually have at least one child come in to chat. That is, one child not related to any of us. Cohousing has taught me (somewhat, see above) to be able to draw better boundaries. "We can't be interrupted anne, sorry". But when we meet in the evenings there are lots of interruptions.

Love to hear if other communities have a way to deal with that.

I like the hat suggestion, I might try it. Sometimes I don't go out to our labyrinth because I'll have to pass all the people on the way.

-Liz
(The Rev.) Elizabeth M. Magill
www.mosaic-commons.org
Berlin, MA
508-450-0431




On Sep 29, 2015, at 8:03 AM, Marilyn Seiler <marilynseiler72 [at] gmail.com> 
wrote:


How does your community address the outside-the-home privacy needs for the introverts of your cohousing community? Is privacy primarily INSIDE the home or are adaptations such as privacy fences allowed and used? What other measures or means are you using to promote a sense of privacy for those who have high privacy needs? Thank you.

Marilyn Seiler




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