Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: enforcement of cohousing rules within your community

[castrohom [at] aol.com (castrohom]

I am particularly interested in - and grateful for - and dismayed by this 
thread of frustration around agreements.
We are a newish cohousing community in Gainesville Florida and are scheduled to 
break ground in the spring.
i.e. We are not yet living together!
I wonder if the word ‘enforcement’ is a somewhat of a problem - it comes with 
such a lot of baggage and implications - prosecuting/policing, 
compelling/coercing, overbearing/persecutory ‘parent’ figures and so on. I can 
see how it might evoke rebellion - even unconsciously the rebellious child 
within.
The whole notion of enforcing cooperation seems like such an oxymoron.
I can easily see how these situations arise (as they do in all groups and 
communities).
I am thinking ahead for our own group and wonder if the word 
implementing/implementation might help to diffuse some of the tension.
I am looking forward to discussing this topic in our own group.
I hope we shall write up a consequences for each ‘defaulted’ agreement in our 
policies document.
I wonder how those can be self-administered or automatic - so that it becomes a 
choice on the part of the individual rather than an unpleasant/unwanted action 
on the part of the community.
Thank you for all your comments
Miranda
http://www.gainesvillecohousing.org

On Nov 7, 2015, at 6:16 AM, cohousing-l-request [at] cohousing.org wrote:

> Date: Fri, 6 Nov 2015 18:03:31 -0800
> From: Martha Wagner <wordbizpdx [at] gmail.com>
> To: cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org
> Subject: Re: [C-L]_ enforcement of cohousing rules and community
> 
> Thank you for your post, Christine. I hope it draws some good responses. I 
> would like to hear how other communities manage the  unapproved landscape 
> ?improvements? you refer to. I would also like to hear more about how your 
> community and others establish listserv guidelines and find someone willing 
> to take on an enforcement role for that.
> 
> Martha Wagner
> Columbia Ecovillage
> Portland, OR
> 
> Date: Thu, 5 Nov 2015 18:29:48 -0700
> From: Christine Johnson <christine-johnson [at] cox.net>
> To: cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org
> Subject: Re: [C-L]_ Enforcement of co-housing rules/policies within your 
> community
> 
> I so appreciate the points made so far about the difficulties that we face in 
> getting folks to comply with agreements.   Outside of contracting for 
> professional management, putting in place consequences that do not involve 
> individuals who live in the community taking a role appears to me, to be 
> impossible.   I am quite happy and privileged to live where I live, enjoy and 
> care for the people I live with, and it?s just not worth the bad feelings to 
> do more than simply state how it is when the topic comes around.   If there 
> was a collective effort here to march into the difficult conversations that 
> it would involve, I?d be a part of that, as would others, I?m sure.  But 
> others who too, are troubled by our failure to effect compliance with our 
> agreements are probably like me -   we choose to tolerate, ignore or give in 
> to folks who do not comply.
> 
> On the positive side, we have two successful practices that work for us:
> 1)  When there have been individuals who are either not complying with an 
> agreement and another objects or two people/households are in conflict with 
> each other, formal mediation has been used.  Accepting a request, if asked, 
> that one participate in a mediation, is one of our agreements.  Over 11 
> years, the issues that have gone to mediation were the few that reached a 
> point of being intolerable to at least one person. It has to date, just been 
> individuals, not the community, who have requested and used mediation.  I?ve 
> been told that it has not always brought folks to  totally happy ending but I 
> think it?s fair to say that mediation helped to prevent those relationships 
> from deteriorating into being totally antagonistic.
> 2)  We have a listserv moderator who has the power to effect consequences if 
> individuals ignore our guidelines for listserv postings.   Through his 
> consistent reminders to everyone and, on occasion, disallowing an 
> individual?s access for a short period, we enjoy a pretty civil and friendly 
> listserv.
> 
> On the negative side, we have over 11 years tolerated, ignored or resigned 
> ourselves to:  
> numerous unapproved ?improvements? to property and landscape plantings (in 
> large part because of our failure to put in place detailed guidelines, a 
> written design review approval process); 
> individuals using common spaces for private storage and in one instance, 
> continuous personal use;
> the presence of feral cats that a resident feeds, with the cats killing birds 
> and spraying and pooping on outdoor furnishings
> 
> I would really appreciate hearing any input on how your community works 
> through these sorts of difficulties (given the 1st one obviously includes 
> having in place detailed design guidelines with a written review process).
> 
> I worked as a community association manager for a number of years and was the 
> ?enforcer? of the rules, regulations and design guidelines, acting on the 
> authority of the Boards of Directors.   Enforcement was the most unpleasant 
> part of my day to day work.   I made very good money as the hired ?cop?.   
> You couldn?t pay me enough though, to do this job in my own community.  
> 
> Christine Johnson
> Stone Curves Cohousing
> Tucson, AZ 
> 
> ****************************************
> Carl Manz & Christine Johnson
> 4145 N. Stone Ave., #102
> Tucson, AZ 85705-8807
> carl-manz [at] cox.net        
> christine-johnson [at] cox.net
> 520-207-8718
> ****************************************      

_________________________
Miranda Castro
Mailing: 4474 NW 1st Avenue 
            Gainesville, FL 32607 
Phone: 352-505-8545
Email: castrohom [at] aol.com