Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Defining "the cohousing principle"

[Jose Marquez (marchpower]

> Anthony Cooke wrote:
>
> "We know how to design neighbourhoods to foster community now.  We don't
> need resident participation in design.  ...
>
> "We need to throw away the idea of the future owners/renters of cohousing
> communities having to be their own designers, and therefore, developers.
> These myths are a huge millstone around the neck of cohousing as a
> movement.

I didn't read Anthony's entire message.  That said, isn't it the ultimate in
hubris to believe that the desires of one person with "certain experiences"
will meet the needs of other unique individuals?  I don't recall every early
human culture being built the same way?  The world has wonderful examples of
thousands of different ways of living together...successfully!  These
communities were created by the community members that lived there and
affected their living condition.  I wonder if the myth is that a community
needs to be "finished" before you all "move in?"  Let's go build it, then
we'll move in and enjoy it.  What's so terrible about experiencing the
creationary process together?  If it is stressful, that is a reflection of
our current society and it's pressures to move faster and faster....the
people of the past had a slower life.  It's the process that matters in
every valuable thing...."raising" the children, "nurturing" the garden,
"designing" the home, "building" the community, "meeting" people, etc.
Sometime, too, the harder things in life are the more important things.  If
I spend 4 years with people creating a community, then I'm truly prepared to
live with these people.  I truly KNOW these people.  I'm more likely to know
that this is the right place for me and my family and I'm more likely to
stick around because my decision will be a more informed one.  If you skip
the difficult pre-move-in experiences (like a honeymoon stage in a
relationship) you move in and are suddently blown away (perhaps) by the
difficulties of doing real stuff together....assigning chores, dealing with
disagreements, etc.  So, how can we decide what hardships are okay to
experience and which hardships we want to "avoid?"

Anyway...not the most organized message, but I tried.  ;->
March