Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Diversity and conflict

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

> Spurred by Sharon's very recent post about diversity and policy, I wish to
> ask an intentionally naive, simplistic, and provocative question:
> 
> Assuming that I try to keep conflict in my life to a reasonable minimum, and
> assuming that diversity is a common precursor of conflict, why in the world
> would I be attracted to an intentional community of any sort that promotes
> diversity?

We don't have conflict. We have differing opinions.

Because almost everyone understands that the goal is working out solutions
that work for everyone and that accepting everyone's values is necessary,
people feel less threatened.

Feeling threatened leads to conflict. I know who I disagree with but don't
feel threatened by them -- I know that we, with the help of others in the
group, will rise to the occasion and work out a solution when we are in
conflict.

We keep coming up against new things to resolve but with each resolution,
people relax more about the next one that comes up. Every week, the whole
place feels more relaxed.  Trust builds with each success.

It is very broadening to work with people who see the world a different way
and fascinating to try to understand why.

Diversity also leads to better solutions because they are _bigger_
solutions. The solution has as many dimensions as the people who develop it.

Interestingly, meeting the values of all the elements means simpler
policies, not more complex. When everyone is happy, the policy is much
clearer and more direct and shorter.

Sharon
-- 
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org


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