Cohousing-L Mailing List: Refining concerns

[Becky Schaller (bschaller]

Recently I wrote this listserv a question about basic and derived needs.  I
appreciate the responses I got as they help me think more aboaut it.
Sharon, I like the way you made the distinction between values and
solutions/opinions/needs/ideas.  That helps me clarify my thinking.  TR,
your task action system is something I think we could consider later on in
our process.  

In terms of getting more clarity as to how to work with concerns, I thought
it might be helpful if I was more specific about my questions for each of
the concerns listed.  So I've said whether I think the concern listed is ok
or if I think it needs more work.

I'd like to invite people to comment on what the facilitator might do to
help the group refine each concern so that it is more helpful for the
community in coming up with proposals.


> We want to keep the meal system in tact.
OK as is.
> 
> We don't want to embarrass people by publicly recording how many hours
> each person works each month.
I think ok, but I'm not sure.  Its wording does eliminate certain solutions.
> 
> We want to honor the many different kinds of work that people do.
Probably too vague.  Would be helpful to know more specifically what kind of
work they are afraid won't be honored.
> 
> We don't want to put a greater value on some work than other work.  For
> example, we don't want to say that pouring cement somewhere counts as work
> hours but bringing dinner to a sick neighbor doesn't count.
This concern is stated better.
> 
> We want to acknowledge that if we are to continue as a community, some kinds
> of work such as the treasurer's job are essential.  Others kinds of work are
> more neighborly and perhaps should not be counted.
I'm not sure if this is a concern or perhaps a commentary on the solution.
Since this concern and the one above it are basically contradictory
concerns, I think it would be helpful to get more specific/basic or
something.  But I'm not sure how.
> 
> We want to lessen the amount that people feel resentment because they think
> they're not getting enough help with the work load.
This comment seems to be connected with an interpretation of the cause.   So
I think it may need more work, but I'm not sure how.   Some people think
they are working so much because they are compulsive workers.   I think we
need to get to a more basic concern, but I'm not sure how.
> 
> We want to lessen the amount that people feel some guilt about not living up
> to other people's expectations.
I'm not sure about this one either, but I think it's basically ok.

> We want people who contribute a lot to the community to feel welcome eating
> at common meals even if they didn't do a cooking/clean up shift.
This is the basic concen we are addressing.
> 
> If people are feeling like they're working too much, then they should take
> responsibility for their own actions.  No one is making them work so hard.
> This is really  not a community issue and I don't want to spend general
> meeting time talking about it.
This concern  questions whether or not this item should even be on the
agenda.  This is also a judgmental statement.  I don't know what to do with
it.

I appreciate any help people might be able to give to me.

Becky Schaller
Sonora Cohousing
Tucson, Arizona



_______________________________________________
Cohousing-L mailing list
Cohousing-L [at] cohousing.org  Unsubscribe  and other info:
http://www.cohousing.org/cohousing-L