Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: "Like-Minded"

[Elizabeth Stevenson (tamgoddess]

> I guess what i miss is more racial diversity. Cohousing seems largely white
> from my observations.
> Elaine
> -- 

I no longer think of diversity as white and black or republican and
democrat, or any other such artificial construct. People are people, and if
you think that being all-white and liberal means everyone thinks alike, you
haven't lived in community yet!

In fact, I propose the whole term "diversity" needs a close second look.
Certainly, I found it desirable to move to a bigger city than the one I grew
up in to get the diversity I craved. But the diversity I wanted was really
just a place where it was okay to be different in whatever way I was
different. Growing up in an all-white small town was suffocating for me. But
the lack of diversity was only a surface element. The real problem was
intolerance of differences. As we all know, differences exist in all people,
regardless of whether you have all "races," creeds and nationalities
represented.

I have noticed less diversity in my community as the years have come and
gone, and I'm not talking about race or ethnicity. I'm talking about people
who stick out, who have difficulty accepting the limitations of cohousing:
the meetings, the work, the thick skin it sometimes requires to live here.
No matter how careful you are, people get hurt living in community, and some
people can't take it. A misunderstanding is likely to have lasting
repercussions. Differences among people are going to tend to diminish over
time, rather than increase. Those who don't fit in, leave, whether it's a
low tolerance for the slow process, or the need to have their environment
significantly different than everyone else's in a place where everyone needs
to agree on what things look, taste, smell, and sound like on a daily basis.

This isn't a value judgement either way for "diversity." It's just an
observation. Any small community is going to get less diverse over time, and
looking for diversity in a small group of people is a waste of time, IMO.
Locating your community in an area where people can get their needs met, be
it ethnic, political or other diversity or anything else, is a better
long-term strategy. It's just cohousing, it isn't your whole world, and if
it is, you're bound to be disappointed in its ability to meet your
expectations.

-- 
Liz Stevenson
Southside Park Cohousing
Sacramento, California
tamgoddess [at] comcast.net


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