Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Do you have frequent blockers who stop needed agreements?

[Martie Weatherly (mhweatherly]

Once someone expresses a concern such as the one you described, it is important 
that the community and the person objecting listen to each other with respect. 
Frequently, especially when someone questions a solution that a team has been 
working on for a long time, emotions run high. 

It then becomes a concern like any concern where the group is committed to a 
solution that works for everyone and not coming from trying to convince someone 
to change their mind. 

There are several things that will move this along, such as suggesting the 
person stand aside. If the community discusses this ahead of time and agrees on 
a procedure, this can become a collaborative discussion and not a battle. 

Not easy but remember we are not looking for unanimity where everyone agrees 
but on consensus where we find the best solution together. 
Martie
Consensus Coach
coachmartie.com

-----Original Message-----
From: <cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org>
Sent: Sep 24, 2023 12:25 AM
To: <cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org>
Cc: <martiew [at] earthlink.net>
Subject: Re: [C-L]_ Do you have frequent blockers who stop needed agreements?

But what if someone feels they are protecting a shared value, and others do
not?

*Glen Ecklund*
711 S. Orchard St., #303
Madison, WI 53715


On Sun, Sep 24, 2023 at 6:09 AM Henning Mortensen
wrote:

> Yes
>
> On Sat, Sep 23, 2023 at 7:26 PM Martie Weatherly mhweatherly [at] 
> earthlink.net>
> wrote:
>
> > Yes the ability to block protects the community from passing something
> > that will damage the community. In the many communities I have spoken to,
> > this is frequently not understood and blocks are used to stop the action
> > for months and years. That is why I am spreading the word so consensus is
> > used appropriately.
> > Martie
> > Consensus Coach
> > coachmartie.com
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From:
> > Sent: Sep 20, 2023 5:02 PM
> > To:
> > Subject: Re: [C-L]_ Do you have frequent blockers who stop needed
> > agreements?
> >
> > Remind every blocker that they can only block if they are protecting a
> > community common value. You&rsquo;re not allowed to block just because
> you
> > personally don&rsquo;t like something.
> >
> > For example, if the community is near a decision to purchase an appliance
> > for the kitchen, one person can&rsquo;t just block because they
> > don&rsquo;t want that
> > make or model. But if there&rsquo;s a common value that all appliances
> > must be
> > made in the USA, and the proposed appliance was from Germany for example,
> > then a block protecting that common value would be allowed.
> >
> >
> >
> > On Wed, Sep 20, 2023 at 4:26 PM Martie Weatherly
> > wrote:
> >
> > > A block is not a veto! The *Heart of Consensus video* will show you
> ways
> > > to get past the frequent blocker, agree on emotional issues, and set
> the
> > > tone for collaboration!
> > >
> > > This video is great to watch in small groups or with the whole
> community
> > > and can also serve as a good orientation to consensus.
> > >
> > > Normally $147, mention this post and you will receive a $40 discount in
> > > September only!
> > > Email me here or use this link to find out more:
> > >
> > >
> >
> https://coachmartie.com/v3/products/?action=addToCart&amp;pid=64dd2148d2172f44344c45b7
> > > _________________________________________________________________
> > > Cohousing-L mailing list -- Unsubscribe, archives and other info at:
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> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > _________________________________________________________________
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> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > _________________________________________________________________
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> >
> >
> >
> >
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