|child raising brochure clarification||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: CJ Q (homeschoolvideogmail.com)|
|Date: Tue, 6 Apr 2021 08:45:57 -0700 (PDT)|
Hi again, Let me explain why I thought of this idea. So far the ideas are perfect and exactly what is needed - ideas and thoughts about kids and families in Cohousing and common grounds. Laird has an example in his blog that one community had problems with neighboring kids using their playground equipment and he points out they hadn't made expectations for any kids. He seems to be a big proponent of making agreements and expectations about a lot of things before conflicts occur. I keep seeing some marketing from a forming group about how wonderful child raising is in cohousing. I admire their idealism but the fact is that having a lot of young children can cause conflicts over expectations on their behaviors in common areas (not on how people parent or deal with it, but what does the community want or expect living together). In my experience, 2 households left (in part) from feeling like other parents were not supervising their children and trying to stop a specific horrible behavior). Another family had similar concerns but also the balance of raising their kids and time in cohousing. The other family I"m not sure exactly why they are leaving but I think they didn't like others in the community pointing out the destruction their children were doing to others and private and community property. Another person left for noise reasons which were not exactly children but they never went to a common meal because the children were running around and too loud. So, I just would love to tell this forming community that it is wonderful to market to young families but for all members to have realistic expectations and to discuss what may come up and the more beforehand the better. One reason I loved the idea of cohousing was to raise my children and I wanted them to get to know neighbors of all ages, but how the whole community reacted (or under - acted) made us up end our lives and move again. Maybe it is unavoidable and I"m just un realistic and people will move no matter what since living with others and their expectations was harder than anyone expected. Thanks again, Carol
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