Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: rules

[Wayne Tyson (landrest]

Lynn and CoHo:

Cooperation is the essence, the original meaning, of "social" (from the Latin 
socius). Where coercion replaces input is what the composers of the US 
Constitution were concerned about when they discussed "the tyranny of the 
majority." 

The cutting edge does not lie upon the mean, it lies, along with error, at the 
edge of the distribution. Discrimination is the heart of an open intellect. 

WT

"'Tis friction's brisk, rough rub that provides the vital spark!" --A. R. Martin

"Democracy is the worst form of government, except for all the others. --W. 
Churchill


----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Lynn Nadeau / Maraiah" <welcome [at] olympus.net>
To: <cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org>
Sent: Wednesday, May 11, 2011 12:25 PM
Subject: [C-L]_ rules


> 
> 
>> There is something subtly disrespectful implied by posting rules; it  
>> implies
>> that the poster is in a superior position in an hierarchy of  
>> coercion and
>> the subject is inferior, in need of instruction from superiors who  
>> presume
>> the worst about their subjects, rather than the best.
> 
> I beg to differ, regarding having "rules", or you can call them  
> guidelines, for things which affect lots of other people, such as  
> common house use. Our CH team makes policies based on soliciting lots  
> of input from community members. When you share a kitchen and living  
> room and vegetable garden with 50 other people, NOT having rules/ 
> guidelines can lead to a lot more tension than coming to clarity about  
> some bottom-line stuff. If we've agreed that having big noise at the  
> CH after 11 pm is only allowed with advance permission (like for a big  
> party), then folks know to ask ahead, and neighbors also know they  
> have a right to call and remind the partiers, if they are being kept  
> awake. The kids know they aren't to wander into the kitchen (where the  
> red flooring starts) during meals, which increases the safety with  
> sharp stuff and hot stuff being moved around by the adult cooks. When  
> your rules are determined in a democratic way, looking to meets  
> diverse needs in as win-win a way as possible, there is no "hierarchy  
> of coercion: !
> 
> Other rules have foundations in real needs: if people walk on the  
> wooden floors in dirty boots, we'll need to spend lots more time and  
> money on maintenance. If people wear perfume in the common house, some  
> members will have allergy attacks. If the patio gates are left open,  
> deer will eat all the herbs and flowers.
> 
> Seems to me it's all about how rules are made, and evolved. Go for an  
> understanding that you are seeking the greatest good for the greatest  
> number, and get understanding and buy-in from those involved.
> 
> Maraiah Lynn Nadeau
> www.rosewind.org
> RoseWind Cohousing, Port Townsend WA
> with a rare THREE homes available on resale, and a patch of giant  
> rhubarb
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