Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Consensus, Majority Vote, "Blocks" [was Report on Survey of Cohousing Communities 2011. Just released. A must read!

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

On 27 Sep 2011, at 7:56 PM, Moz wrote:

> ok, the big list of synonyms:

> willingness to compromise
> Convergence
> harmonization.
> reciprocity.
> reconciliation.
> accommodation
> pleasing

> converge on a harmonious term, yielding in reciprocal fashion until we 
> reconcile
> to a new accommodation that's pleasing to all.

Gerard Endenburg's goal in developing sociocracy/dynamic governance was to 
create a business that functioned with the same harmony as his boarding school 
had achieved with consensus. His first book begins with a poem.

That isn't apparent from the usual presentation of dynamic governance as 
designed by an engineer based on cybernetic principles of communications and 
control. One reason for this more technical approach is the need outside of 
alternative communities to present consent as practical, not utopian or 
mystical. Endenburg knew that in his school the Quaker founder could talk of 
peace and love but in a business environment, decisions had to be made whether 
people loved each other or not.

Harmony is the aim, and harmony requires results. Research into teams has shown 
that success creates a strong team, not personal growth. Personality conflicts 
melt when the team is focused on and achieves success. With success, people 
adjust to each other harmoniously.

So a focus on success defined as the best solution for everyone — given the 
normal limitations of time, money, and ability — produces the most harmonious 
environment in which to live and work. In cohousing, I've wondered if it would 
be good for communities to set annual goals — this year we are going to develop 
our meal program, our programs for children, or our systems for responding to 
illnesses or other personal emergencies. These things can be measured from year 
to year.

Measurement is stressed in dynamic governance because it creates objective 
indicators that can be compared over time. Progress becomes apparent. I haven't 
researched it but there are questionnaires that measure happiness.

Rob Sandelin used to say something like there are only two questions to be 
asked. Are you happy? And are you happier than last year? And maybe, what would 
make you happier in the next year?

> everyone involved is giving something to the common good. Too often
> consensus is seen by novices as meaning that everyone gets what they
> want, especially them.

Perhaps a solution with which everyone can move closer to what they want. 
Successive approximations. Or get what they want without taking from someone 
else. A win-win, not a win-lose. Compromise is a lose-lose — not a good place 
to begin or end. It's a zero sum game.

We have a facilitator who stands up before every hopefully decisive discussion 
and says no one is going to get everything they want. The effect is not what he 
intended. It's a warning: Bad news. Settle for second or third or even fourth 
best. There is no aspiration. Why bother?

Another stresses common ground. In cohousing we are literally already on common 
ground so when you don't feel harmonious, the idea of more common ground just 
creates more tension. 

An outside facilitator can act as a mediator and say I'm going to help you work 
this out — I've helped many communities resolve more difficult conflicts than 
this one so everyone is in a better place. That offers a promise of help and a 
new perspective. (We all know our internal facilitators are mucked up in the 
issue along with us so they can't inspire the same hopeful trust. And they have 
in all likelihood already tried everything they know to try.)

Sharon
----
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org